Things I can do:
1. Breathe, because that’s all you need to do
2. Pick up phone, open bookmarked meditation session, lie down and listen, not bothering about sound quality (let it go!)
3. Turn on TV and binge-watch episodes of silly programs you’ve recorded, especially the ones on people that are worse off than you since they’ve all perished in horrible plane crashes (just kidding, I worry about them even days and weeks after I’ve watched the program)
4. Find something that feels, looks, sounds or smells good and try to enjoy that:
quickly flick through a soft book or a magazine (no reading), lie down on a velvet pillow, cuddle, listen to rain fall, ask someone to bring you different types of chocolate to compare
5. Be kind to yourself (do the above)
Have a tiny bit of energy left? In that case:
1. Drink hot chocolate
2. Devour cookies (along with 1.)
3. Cup something that is just a tad too hot like a cup of tea
4. Go outside, feel warmth of the sun on skin
5. Lie down on bed or sit outside with beautiful interior design magazines
6. Write down how you feel
7. Have a shower/bath
This morning I saw an ad inspiring me to do the following:
I am becoming really good at doing the exact opposite, especially on those days I spend wondering when I can finally go to bed. It’s like being locked up in a body with broken arms, two swollen black eyes, a mouth clenched shut and sprained ankles but in a mental way. This thing will just take time to heal.
Even though I very well know being sad and unable to do anything is normal (now it is anyway), I’m still truly disappointed. Some inner voice is wondering what has become of the enthusiastic, energetic Kathleen and not in a nice way:
Girl, can’t you just get up and do something, really! (rolls eyes)
Not something I would tell anyone with the physical injuries mentioned above.
That’s why I’ve come up with the list featured above on things I might be able to do. They’ll hopefully soothe my inner judge and manage to distract me. I don’t know whether it will work, but I hope that next time I get stuck, my list will be in reach and I will:
have enough energy to pick it up;
(most difficult) not feel too sad and detached but instead be motivated to actually read it.
Adding the following might be a good start:
Pick up this list when you do absolutely NOT want to do so, that’s when it’ll be most useful.